Dear Mr. Ineffable Baritone,
We've established many things about each other over the last month or so, and I feel it is safe to share these truths which I did not hold to be self-evident, because it actually took a lot of time to investigate. Twenty hours is not a long time to get to know someone, i now realize with a sad heart. But no matter.
+ You were a stage actor, mostly for Shakepearean plays, in which you graced Hamlet in cloth and earth-shatteringly deep theater voice.
+ You do not need to eat. Not if you don't want to. Not anything. I have tried and failed to bribe you out of the closet with food, but apparently you do not accept leverage. Of any kind.
+ You would probably look very nice and suave and cleaned-up if you decided to shave-and-suit one day. Although I must say, the turtlenecks and battered blue jeans are kind of eye-catching.
+ You probably could get away with anything if you wanted to. The baritone, after all, is ineffable, and can convince nearly any person who isn't deaf to do anything or believe any words you wanted them to. (Then again, even a deaf person would be intimidated by the deeply-resounding vibrations you voice makes in the concrete.)If you told me that you were going to grind up power tools in a blender and drink them as an energy shake, I would totally go for it and set you loose in my dad's workshop and garage. I shit you not.
+ If I ever asked you to set me loose in your garage, you'd raise your eyebrows and tell me that I must be feeling frisky today.
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